Featured

Locking in Moments

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Have you ever had moments where you wish that time could just stand still? Of course, we all do. I’ve always wondered why during mundane times such as being stuck in traffic, being in class or at work, every minute can feel like an hour. Time seems to pass so slowly then but time really does fly when you’re having fun. I am all about living in the moment and creating memories. Although the moments don’t seem to last, the memories tend to live on in our hearts forever.

For the past few weeks, my children (who are grown adults now) have been visiting me in Korea. It was there first time being in Korea and I was more excited for them to come than me being here. I wanted to show them everything I had been telling them about since they were little. Every day was jam packed and I hope they had as amazing time as I did. They both have since left, back to school and their prospective jobs. Although there were great memories made, I can’t help but wonder how fast the time went while they were here.

I’m an empty nester and have been for the past few years. It was incredibly difficult at first. I had to see not one, but two leave the nest. With time, it does get easier, you tend to settle into a different daily routine and mindset. I do have my moments when I do miss them horribly and that will never change no matter how long it’s been. It’s a certain type of emptiness that tends to linger. I no longer heard their familiar footsteps, or the sounds of them rummaging through the fridge for a snack. The sounds stopped completely. As moms/ parents, we spend a big portion of our lives caring and tending to our children’s well being. Our main focus and priorities revolve around them. When that wasn’t there on a daily basis, you start questioning your entire identity. I was a mom, who am I now?

When my boys were younger, I was always told “they grow up so fast.” I cannot tell you just how true those words are. I remember when they turned a week old, and wanting them to stop growing. A week turned into a year, then the teenage years and in a blink of an eye, they were adults. Yes, it really is just that fast. Every week and every year, I didn’t want my kid to keep growing. I did enjoy every moment and still do. I am defiantly that parent that would have been fine with my boys living with me until they were 40. I’ve met parents who couldn’t wait for their kids to move out and I just couldn’t wrap my mind around that. Children are such a blessing and I loved being with mine.

We do not get our yesterdays back. Once it’s passed, it’s a memory. My advice is, to not only parents, is to really make each moment count. If your child wants to go to the movies or the beach, or whatever they would like to do with you, then take them. They can’t make their childhood memories with you if these things don’t happen. There will be a day when you wish you could, but no longer can. We are not promised a tomorrow, but you’re going to wish you had your yesterdays back.

Lock in your moments, take a minute to really take everything in and appreciate the time you have. Memories are great and will always carry you, but please be fully present in the now.

Thanks so much for stopping by!

What I Wore:
Pink Sweater by H&M
Pink Tulle Skirt by Migliore
Grey Bodycon Dress by Garage
Pink Flannel by Walmart
Floral Dress by Colza
Black Sweater by H&M
Black Tulle Skirt by Migliore
Denim Jacket by One5one
Yellow Dress by Old Navy

In a world full of pants, be a dress ~Jules

Featured

Stop Apologizing, Start Posting

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Life’s moments are so fleeting and how we feel about or see ourselves can change on any given day. Some days you can feel unstoppable, on top of the world, and then there are those days you feel insecure. “I don’t want to be that girl who posts selfies all the time,” is something I hear frequently. Who cares if you are? The only one who really notices or is paying that close attention, is you. Kim Kardashian even has a book about it! Kim is making a fortune off of her book featuring her own selfies and she’s definately not apologizing for it.

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Stop apologizing, start posting. You will look back when you’re 80 and think wow I was hot, I’m so glad I have these photos to look back on. If you’re starting off your posts by saying “I’m sorry, but I feel cute today” or “so sorry for the repost but I really loved this dress” then stop it! If you’re feeling yourself, then good, you should be. You’re gorgeous so don’t be afraid to shine! You have no reason to apologize to anyone, just be that confident you. Post it. Take that photo. Don’t be your own personal hater. There’s already enough of that out there in the world.

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Are you feeling fly in that dress/ outfit? Is your makeup is on point? Then yes, take that pic, take that selfie. No need to apologize. “Sorry guys for another selfie”…stop saying sorry for being you. Why are you apologizing? If someone tells you otherwise, drown out that noise. You don’t need that kind of negativity, you do you, boo! If you see your girl posting on social media, be supportive! Queens should be supporting fellow queens and like her photo! Tell her she looks fabulous because kindness is free. Last I heard, no one is living your life but you. Bring out your inner goddess, your high level diva moment and snap away!

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I used to watch shows of celebrity homes and many would typically have a life size portrait of themselves hanging on their walls. I remember thinking they were incredibly vain. I don’t have this mindset anymore. In fact, I can see myself doing the same thing! I hope I do have full shots of me adorning my walls someday. If I felt incredible, I want to memorialize and remember it. Nothing vain about it. Live your most extra fabulous best life! This is a fun way to document your journey and these moments because it doesn’t last forever. Please stop apologizing and just post it!

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Thanks so much for stopping by!

What I Wore:
Pink Tulle Dress from Migliore
Lashes and Lips Tee from Amazon
Black Midi Skirt by Monologue
Pink Stan Smith Sneakers by Adidas
Yellow Floral Dress by Fabric Gray
Black Lace Dress by Blooming Jelly (Amazon)

In a world full of pants, be a dress ~ Jules

Featured

Taking Photos And Social Anxiety

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Taking photos is just a part of social media, blogging, etc, and it plays a big role. The smiles, the poses but what really goes into that photo? When you’re out in public or in a crowded area or you’re with friends and take photos, or even by yourself with a selfie, you snap a few and stop. In a selfie ruled world, a lot of us really don’t like to do it in view of other people. Our Facebook. Instagram, snaps chats, social media’s profiles are filled with selfies and pics. I don’t get why, in reality, we are quick with taking photos in public and try to be as discreet as possible about it. We all do it, we snap a few and slyly look around to see if anyone is watching. If you’re in the clear, you take more and if not, you put your phones away. You don’t take too many, you don’t want to draw attention to yourself. Why the judgement when we all selfie? I really don’t know why there is such a stigma against taking multiple photos but after a short amount of shots, we stop. We all do it. You take a few and keep it moving. If you’re feeling that level of self consciousness with just a few snaps from your phone, being a blogger, when photos are key, it can be even more daunting. It’s not easy putting yourself out there like that and it really does take some guts to do it.

I wish I could snap a few shots and call it a day but it never happens that way. I can take dozens, sometimes even a couple hundred and only a few shots are even usable. Even worse, I can spend hours shooting and everything will work against me, the wind, the lighting, weather, location, my outfit, poses, crowds and I can literally walk away without any usable content. It’s frustrating to say the least, to spend hours and no pay off. I guess I can say it’s a learning experience and use it to my advantage the next time around.

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A lot of us already know that the ideal time to take photos is when there is no one around and not crowded. So we head off at the best time before this particular spot becomes congested. If something opens up at 9, I will probably get there around 8 or even earlier. Thank you google for showing the busiest times at locations. But then you have the prime golden hour, which is the most magical lighting, but everyone is around. When I am in a highly populated area, I can feel silly and quite self conscious as people are passing by.

Taking photos around others isn’t as easy at looks. What you don’t see beyond the smile and pose, is all the people walking around. Some stare, some gawk, point, honk their horn, laugh, roll their eyes, and some ask what you’re doing. These things really do happen. It’s not always bad, I’ve met some supportive people along the way. It can be difficult to be in your element and just do your thing. We all want to take our friendship or selfie shots as soon as we can and get it over with, but I have to keep taking photo after photo to get that best shot. Even if it means there’s a crowd milling around and at that point, I feel ridiculously vain taking photos, setting up my tripod for just myself. What I’ve learned is to ignore it or smile at the passerbys. Most of the time, they smile back, so this definitely works. Or I pretend I am fiddling around with my camera, making adjustments until they leave and this works too.

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What I have learned, that works the best, is just to face it head on. I try not over think it, and tell myself that I don’t know these people and they don’t know me. I’ll probably never see them again and keep on posing and smiling untill I have the photos I need. It can be unnerving having people watch you. You have to dig deep and pretend you don’t see them and not let it affect you. Sometimes I have to blast Eminem or my girl Cardi B through my headphones just to get into that mode and mindset. Stop getting in my own head if I want to get it done. Taking photos is public places can be embarrassing and sometimes I just want to pack up my stuff and leave. But I make myself stay, I push through it and remind myself that it’s not their opinion of me that makes a difference in who I am.

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I tell myself, you got this, who cares what they think, stay confident, you’re strong, you’re a boss babe, just go take those photos. Sometimes I can be quite harsh and not so nice to myself and say “just stfu, quit being a baby, who cares about those people and just go do it. I literally have to tell my brain to shut up , turn my thoughts off and make myself. Its important that I set my purpose and know I have reason for doing this. I have a goal and it’s something I have to remind myself.

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Does anyone else have anxiety when taking photos in public places? How did you overcome it?

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Thanks so much for stopping by!

What I Wore:
Blue Floral Dress by Colza (Japanese Fashion)
Pink Korean Traditional Dress (Hanbok)- no brand
Sequined Heart Pullover by Blooming Jelly
Scalloped Lace Pink Dress by Speechless
Blazer by IFNE (Korean Fashion)

In a world full of pants, be a dress~ Jules

Featured

Joys of Traveling Solo

I started my journey in solo traveling in 2017. It was my first trip to California and something I had never ventured into before. I was nervous, a little scared and also really excited. After having done one under my belt, I have since done a couple of others and will continue to do so.

When I tell people that I will be traveling alone, I usually get met with the same expressions and same questions. I get a look of disbelief and awe. I get asked “Aren’t you scared? Won’t you be lonely? Isn’t that dangerous?” Or “I could never take a trip so far away from home all by myself.” Yes, sometimes I can get a little scared and it can be dangerous. Let’s face the reality, being a female solo traveler can have its disadvantages. You really have to watch your back and be aware of your surroundings. There are people in this world that do not have your best intentions at heart and being alone can be an easy target. I don’t venture out at night and I don’t put myself in situations that make me feel uncomfortable. Second, do I ever get lonely? Rarely. I am more focused on my destination and taking in all the sights around me. Sometimes I think about my loved ones who would appreciate the location but I do try and live in the moment.

I believe that every woman should take at least one solo trip in her life. This is a wonderful chance at reflection and really getting to know yourself. There is such beauty in being alone in your own thoughts and presence. Some of my trips have brought out the most clarity and understanding to the matters of my own heart. I encourage you to at least try it, just have a well thought out plan and agenda before going all in.

Some advantages to solo traveling, is being on your own schedule. I am such a type A personality that I need to have a set schedule and itinerary. Deviating from my plan brings me anxiety. Since I am on my own, I don’t have to worry about being on someone else’s time or stress out because they are running late, which puts me behind on my day. I choose the stops I want to make and the sights I want to see. If I want to take an hour taking photos somewhere, I certainly will! If I want to take in an exhibit or some other cheesy touristy pit stop, there is no one around that will turn that idea down. If there is food or drinks I am craving, I don’t have to ask if anyone wants the same, I’ll just indulge.

Solo traveling is quite liberating, fun and a soul searching experience. It’s highly pampering and all about you! Have you traveled alone before? How was your experience and where did you go?

Thanks so much for stopping by!

What I Wore:
Yellow Pleated Dress by Zara
Double G Belt by Gucci
White Floral Dress by The Show Box
Pink Polo Dress by Lacoste
Stan Smith Sneakers by Adidas

In a world full of pants, be a dress ~ Jules

Sneakers and Dresses

The sneakers with dresses trend started a few years back and has been hugely popular since. I’m typically a heels type of girl and wearing sneakers, unless at the gym, didn’t appeal to me. Needless to say, I’m behind on the trend but I’ve been fully embracing the look lately.

While being in Korea, there is quite a lot of walking around. A good, comfortable pair of shoes is a must here. After a few times of venturing the city in heels, I decided to put them back in the closet for the time being. Due to the amount of traveling I’ve been doing, heels just don’t seem practical.

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Sneakers paired with dresses change up your outfit to effortless and easy. Your look becomes casual, comfortable and stylish. I can’t believe I waited so long to try this look! It now seems as if a whole new world has been opened up to me and I just can’t get enough. Who knew there were so many cute sneakers on the market? Obviously, I didn’t and I was the last one to get the memo. However, I’m happy that I’m wearing them now and will continue to do so in the warmer months.

How do you feel about sneakers with dresses? Do you wear them often? Here are some ways I styled mine.

What I Wore:
Blue Midi Dress by Monologue
Pink/ White Adidas Stan Smith
Black Polo Dress by Lacoste
Black/ White Adidas Superstar
Pink T-shirt Dress by The Gap

In a world full of pants, be a dress ~Jules

My (Half) Birthday

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Today is my half Birthday and I think that is cause for a celebration! If you ask me how old I am today, I am probably going to lie. Not because I’m embarrassed of my age, but because, after a certain age, a woman likes to keep those things to herself. Half birthdays aren’t recognized anymore after the age of twelve or so. Up until that age, we were more than happy to tell everyone and we made sure we proudly include the half after the year. No one really has a party or anything like that but why can’t you you enjoy your special half year mark? I think we should celebrate it and I’ll do it wholeheartedly.

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There are limited things in life that we choose to celebrate. I choose to acknowledge the big and the small, it really does make life worthwhile. Life is too short, to only recognize monumental moments and achievements. I’m a big believer in loving yourself and doing the things that bring you happiness. Today, I’m going to treat myself to my favorite caramel iced coffee and eat all the macarons that my heart desires. It’s my day, my half birthday, my half birthday week and my half birthday month! Welcome to my party! I’m grateful and blessed to be alive to be able to enjoy this experience. This is my first year celebrating this special day and I’ve been anticipating this for 6 months. I plan to do make this day special every year and keep this tradition going. I’m glad I did it and I wish you would celebrate yours too!

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What I Wore:
Red Dress by Ralph Lauren
Black Ribbed Dress by Soul Way
Pink Cardigan/ Duster by Soul Way
Black/ White Polka Dot Dress by Old Navy

In a world full of pants, be a dress ~Jules

Featured

Harsh Criticism

Recently, I went on a lunch date with an old friend of mine. We hadn’t seen each other in a while, so of course, there was quite a bit of catching up to do. I showed her my social media and I wasn’t expecting the response I received. She had put down most of my photos and didn’t like at least 75% of the dresses I wore. She mocked me for wearing longer styles and said I looked like a missionary or a Mormon. (No offense at all to those who are, I’m only repeating what was said to show context of this conversation that took place.) Ironically, some of my dresses are, in fact, from Mormon clothing sites. She asked me why I didn’t show more skin and why I chose to be so covered up.

At first, I was taken a back, a little offended even. I knew it wasn’t coming from a bad place, she’s a brutally honest friend that speaks her mind and doesn’t hold back. We really do have different tastes. However, it did sting a little. Was she right? Was she seeing something everyone else did and I was blind to it? After a while of pondering on it, I realized that while putting myself out there, I need to take the criticism whether it be good or bad. If there was a time to develop thick skin, this was it. I’m not always going to get positive reactions and it’s through the negatives that I can learn and do better. I’m not everyone’s cup of tea, some prefer coffee. Not everyone is going to love what you do or wear. It’s easy to hear the glowing compliments, but hard to listen to the negatives. What can I learn from this? How can I improve? Sometimes criticism just serves to build greater strength. If I think I’m on the right track and still feel passionate about the direction I’m headed, I’ll drown out that noise and keep going. Be your own cheerleader and your own biggest fan.

Take the criticism, learn, grow and use it to become your best possible self. Sure, you’re not going to please everyone. I had to remind myself that this is what I like, and doing what I love is the most important thing. If you feel passionate about something, no one is going to be able put those flames out. Listening to the negatives that others have to say will only drag you down. It did drag me down, but only momentarily. I got back up and adjusted my crown, as all queens should do.

What I Wore:
Black Heart Tee by Target
Pink Ruffled Skirt by JW Style
White Eyelet Dress by Momento
Pink Polka Dot Dress by Tj Maxx

In a world full of pants, be a dress~ Jules

Featured

No Comparison

“I’m the only one of me…. baby, that’s the fun of me. You’re the only one of you… baby that’s the fun of you” Taylor Swift, Me.

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It’s hard not to compare ourselves to others, whether it be in real life or on social media. Scrolling through your feed, picture perfect lives and images flood our screens. Filter or no filter, the perfect hair, body, makeup, clothes or destinations of others can make our lives look bleak in comparison.

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I know that I’m guilty of playing the comparison game and I can’t possibly be the only one. Although I am a happy and confident girl, I can see one (or many) photos online that can make me feel less than adequate. I wonder if blogging or having a presence on social media can have that impact a little more. For example, I can feel great about a photo I’ve posted or an outfit I’m wearing, only to see a much better pic of someone else. Their page is filled with amazing photography or their outfits are stunning, with a wardrobe I can only dream of having. I start questioning if my photos are up to par, and I begin over analyzing every flaw I have.

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The thing is, we’re only human and we can’t help but to compare. It’s going to happen every once in a while, but it shouldn’t be something you should obsess over. Someone out there is going to have a better photos, higher skill set, better body, whatever it is, someone is going to do it better than you or me. We each have our own individual strengths and weaknesses. By not focusing on the weaknesses, building and enhancing our strengths is what makes us stand out as individuals. However, we all bring something worthwhile to the table and we are all so different and unique. That in itself is an amazing thing, how special we each are. We live in a big world, how boring it would be if we were all the same?

There is only one of me, there really is only one of you. When we realize that and embrace it, there is absolutely no comparison.

What I Wore:
Pink Ribbed Dress – Korean Fashion
Blue/White Gingham Dress by Old Navy
Pink Floral Dress – Korean Fashion

In a world full of pants, be a dress~ Jules

Featured

The Road To Happiness

“The most important thing is to enjoy your life- to be happy, it’s all that matters.” Audrey Hepburn

Most people want to be happy and many just don’t know how to achieve it. I’ve spent many years being unhappy and the longer I was, it just never seemed possible to get out of the head space I was stuck in. Years ago, I wanted to quit something so badly. I was young, afraid and miserable. Someone told me to fake being happy and eventually I would actually really feel happy. This stayed with me for many years, but I didn’t follow through with the advice. Although I didn’t quit, I was still quite miserable.

The faking bit can apply to many things, happiness, confidence… we all know the ‘fake it till you make it’ phrase. Even though I didn’t take the advice then, I’ve completely embraced it now. I mean, nothing else worked, why not give this a try?

Every day, we make choices. We choose to start our day with a cup of coffee, we choose to excercise and we choose our decisions that are going affect us. So why not choose to be happy?

There are things in life that’s going to bring us down, even daily sometimes. Divorce, sickness, death and finances, sometimes these things are completely out of our control. I know that things happen for a reason and we may come to realize it later. However, there are things that’s happened in my life that makes me wonder if they had to happen at all? What was the learning experience or possible benefit from something so painful or negative? I may never understand but I do know that I’m alive today and that alone is something to be excited about. It’s not guaranteed but I’ve been blessed with another day.

Instead of living day after day feeling miserable, it only serves as wasted time and energy. The biggest regret people have is what they should have done. Even I have those regrets as I reflect back on my own wasted time and energy, spent on the wrong people, places and things.

As much negative energy that we put in to being sad and miserable, the same could be said for putting in positive energy. I’ve learned, it doesn’t happen overnight and it’s most definately a choice, even if you have to start by faking it. It’s a new mindset and you’ve got to be consistent with it.

Here are some ways to find your inner happy place. Begin by loving yourself first. Treat yourself, spoil yourself, indulge yourself, even if there is no one out there that will, do it for you. You are with you 24/7, and you cannot escape yourself, it’s impossible. Do things you love to do. Go for walks, enjoy the sunset, read your favorite books, paint, write, travel, and pet your dog. There’s plenty for you to do and most don’t cost anything. If you stop doing the things that you love, you start feeling unhappy.

Motion is emotion. Keep on moving, you’re not going to find what you’re looking for in front of the tv, or sitting on your porch watching the world go by. Make your own happiness, just keep it in motion. Being sedentary is stale and that’s what your life will reflect.

My road to happiness was a long one. Start with loving you first and surrounding yourself with what you love. Fake it, put a smile on your face or laugh, even if you don’t want to. Eventually, it won’t be a fake smile, you’re literally going to feel that happy bursting inside of you. When you’ve reached a happiness point in your life, share it with others. Make yourself happy first, that’s where it begins. It’s not selfish, it’s your life and you only have one chance at it. Make it your best life.

Thanks so much for stopping by and I wish you all the happiness in the world. It’s out there, you just have to choose it.

What I Wore:
White Top by H&M
White Tulle Skirt by Migliore
Black/ White Maxi Dress by Joinus
Blue Top by H&M
Blue Tulle Skirt by Migliore

In a world full of pants, be a dress ~Jules

My Seoul Secret

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I’ve been keeping a secret. A big secret. I’m going to Korea! I didn’t dare utter this before, maybe because I was afraid that if anything bad could happen, it would. I’m a relentless worrywart and my anxiety gets the best of me. Usually in my case, if something is going to go wrong, it typically does. Cancelled flight? Yup, it’s mine. Plane crash? Damn, why does this happen to me?! I didn’t want to jinx it and I didn’t even feel the excitement until I had actually boarded the plane. This trip is 17 years in the making and I really had to pinch myself to believe that it’s real and really happening! I could hardly contain myself, as I stretched out on all 3 seats. Yes, I had all 3 seats to myself!! Window, aisle and middle, this girl got so lucky and now I’m counting my lucky stars!

I was born and raised in Korea (Seoul, specifically) and spent my formative years here and even my rebellious teenage years here. I had dreamt of going home for so long and I’m here! As soon as I got off of the plane, I cried. I cried tears of joy, tears of sadness and tears of relief. I cried for the young girl I left behind and the woman I was becoming. Tears rolled down my my face freely, without abandon, I was finally home. It felt surreal, I kept wondering if I was dreaming. If I was dreaming, I never wanted to wake up.

Why did it take so long for me to return? Trust me, I wanted to come back. Every single day. For 17 years, I wanted nothing more than to be “home” in my “motherland.” The truth is, I had to put my longing on hold. I was a young mom raising two boys, a family. Let me tell you, raising two boys is expensive but I wouldn’t trade it for the world. My time with them was beyond precious and so fleeting. As many parents, especially single parents would know, there are always expenses and unexpected expenses that crop up. It’s really never ending, once you pay off one, here comes the other. Even if when I could afford a round trip plane ticket, how could I afford a place to stay, food and other accommodations on top of my monthly bills?

For years, I avoided a lot K-pop and Korean dramas because they were too painful. It was as if, what I had wanted so badly was right in front of me yet so far out of reach. My eyes would well up in tears every time. Seeing them made me so emotionally invested, it was just easier if I avoided them altogether. I even stopped speaking Korean, at restaurants or markets. I can’t explain why, I just know that it was easier to pretend that this part of me didn’t exist rather than face it.

Coming back to Korea, felt like a now or never moment. My boys were grown and I was empty nesting. I was so drawn to go… I had talked about it for years. I couldn’t put it off any longer, 17 years was already long enough.

So, I’m here now and I couldn’t be happier. Land of the Morning Calm…. I’m home, I’m free and I love every minute of it.

Thank you so much for being a part of my journey.

What I Wore:
Black and White Dress by Forever21

In a world full of pants, be a dress~ Jules

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